I Am Unstoppable

I want to introduce you to Brittany, who is 25 years old, soon to be 26. She is young lady who is an amazing fighter. Her battle may not always be easy but she is prepared for the fight. She has not let being on oxygen stop her from doing what she loves. She even wants to hike up a mountain! Brittany is such an inspiration to any one battling mental and physical health issues. She is such a strong and amazing lady. I hope you find encouragement in her story.

Q: How long have been on oxygen?

A: I have been on oxygen for a year in April.

Q: What is your story? How were you diagnosed and what was the diagnosis?

A: I was diagnosed with hypoxia due to my heart condition which caused me to have a bunch of small vessels instead of large vessels. The collateral supply of blood was okay for me when I was younger and had a smaller body. As I grew and went through puberty I noticed that I wasn’t able to keep up with my friends as well on the soccer field. My doctor at the time ended up saying that I had exercise induced asthma. Even with the inhalers before each game, I still would come off the field unable to breathe well. It felt like I just wasn’t getting enough air. To me, it didn’t feel like an asthmatic wheeze. It wasn’t until last year when I was having some trouble breathing when I was working as a teacher in the classroom that they were able to diagnose me. One of the nurses in the hospital had me walk for her in the hallway while she checked my oxygen levels. They noticed that with just minimum walking, my levels dropped from 98 sitting down to 84 walking around. Doctors then took note of this and walked me around about eight more times. They had me wear oxygen while walking to see what liter would keep my sats at least 96%. For me it was 1.5 to 2 liters with walking. I left the hospital after 4 days of being on the cardiac floor on oxygen for exertion. I have exertional hypoxia and circulatory hypoxia caused by my CHD.
For my CHD story: I was born with a large VSD that caused me to have pulmonary hypertension as a baby. I had open heart surgery. I also was born with sinus node disease which had an effect on my heart beats and caused me to have pauses in between beats. I had a pacemaker implanted for this. I also was born with anomalies of the vascular system which is what lead me to be on oxygen. I have a right sided aorta and my subclavian artery was isolated from the aorta and I have something called subclavian steal syndrome which has caused neurological symptoms including frequent migraines and dizziness when my blood pressure on one side is below 90/60. Besides the oxygen use, I manage a heart condition and the side effects that come along with that every day.

Q: How is your life different now?

A: My life is different now because my invisible illness has turned visible. Before, it was a struggle for me to explain to people when I had off days and wasn’t feeling well. The tricky thing about invisible illness is the fact that it is invisible. People do not see what is going on inside our bodies. I was dealing with the effects of hypoxia for a really long time. I was tired, in a brain fog, and always felt lethargic after working out or after long days on my feet. The only difference now is that I know why I was feeling the way I was. I know that the oxygen is something that helps me on particularly difficult days.

Q: How do you stay positive/what is something you learned about yourself?
A: Staying positive with a chronic conditions, especially one that gets a lot of stares from people, isn’t easy. I get frustrated with myself as well as with my body most days. I go through periods of depression where I see so many of my friends doing life a lot differently. It helps me to remember that each person has their own story. You never know who is dealing with something invisible, who is dealing with mental illness, or who had a really bad day. The truth is, everyone has something that they don’t necessarily share with others. My positivity comes from the fact that maybe when people see me out, I can be some sort of inspiration for them. I post things on social media and spread awareness, not for pity purposes, but for the simple fact that by hearing my story and seeing how open I am about my struggles, maybe it will help others reach that vulnerability.
I have learned that it’s okay to be honest about how I am feeling. I spent most of my life trying so hard to make it seem like everything was okay when it wasn’t. I spent my life brushing off the tiredness, weakness, and emotions that felt too big to handle. I have embraced the fact that I manage PTSD as a result of my medical conditions, as well as depression and anxiety that goes along with knowing that I have a chronic condition.
It honestly takes an army of people to help me get through a week. I couldn’t do it without the support of my amazing family and friends as well as my boyfriend. I have a whole new level of appreciation for everything that they have gone through with me and the fact that they have never left my side even on the days when I didn’t want anyone there. I have an amazing team of doctors, as well as a therapist who is pretty awesome at letting me vent out the bad days and could just let me talk the entire session. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and to reach out!

Q: What is a dream of yours to do one day?

A: I would love to be able to go on a hike up a mountain. I know to some, this may sound completely insane especially if you’re thinking “girl, you’re on oxygen! What are you nuts!?” . Truthfully, I have always been athletic and tried my whole life not to let my heart condition get in the way of that. I played sports and contact sports like ice hockey. My cardiologist would joke with me and say “can’t you try something like golf instead?” These sports were mine though! I loved every second of being on the ice, no matter how out of breath or red in the face I was. Despite my condition, I still work out at a pretty high level of intensity. Throughout the week I enjoy doing workout videos (with my oxygen on of course). I especially love Jillian Michaels workouts as well as interval training (HIIT videos) and I enjoy walking and yoga on the days when I need to give my body a break. So, the dream of being able to hike up a mountain isn’t that far fetched but I would love to say that I did it! Even if I have to go through 2 oxygen tanks !

Q: Is there something on your bucket list that you hope to do one day oxygen or not?

A: I want a family one day. As of now, I will hopefully be able to use my own eggs but would need a surrogate to carry the baby for me. If this is not possible, I am completely open to adoption and would love to adopt a child. I want to experience life with a family and with children by my side in the future.

Q: What is a fear or an insecurity that you have about being on oxygen?

A: I have a lot of fears about my condition. Some are rational and some aren’t (thanks to my anxious mind). I feel insecure when I am dressed up and feel as though I need to use my oxygen. My irrational mind tells me that I don’t look good with it on and that I won’t be as pretty if I have to wear it. I know that this is far from the truth and I would NEVER say to other people who are on oxygen the things that I say to myself. I have realized though that a lot of people, not even just those who are on oxygen, are their own WORST critics. I will give all of those struggling with your image when you are on oxygen the same advice that I should be giving myself. Your oxygen doesn’t make you ugly, it doesn’t make you less of a person, it doesn’t change who you are, it doesn’t change any of the qualities about yourself that make you YOU! Think about it, you would never say to someone who needs to take daily medications “you are ugly for taking those pills” . Until medicine comes up with further advances other than oxygen (which may or may not be in this lifetime), the oxygen is OUR medication. It is what is keeping my blood flowing and it is what is fueling my workouts. Don’t let the fear of how you look keep you from truly living your life.

Brittany’s fight is far from over but she is unstoppable. She is taking life by the horns and won’t let anything stop her from living an amazing life. There may be hard days but she is learning to talk to others and not be isolated in pain. I encourage you to talk to someone if you are having a hard time. Don’t be afraid to let others in your life. Brittany had to learn to see herself as beautiful, even with the oxygen on. I think most people on oxygen go through a stage like this. I know I did. She states it perfectly, that it’s your medicine. For those reading this that are on oxygen, I hope you look in mirror and see not an oxygen cord but the beauty already on your face and in your soul. You are a brave human being who is fighting a battle and your weapon is oxygen. Never be ashamed of something that helps breathe life into you. You are strong and beautiful. You can follow Brittany’s journey on her Instagram @brittfoster9.